My Jesus Morning

Outside the train station, a man stood handing out little religious themed pamphlets, telling anyone who listened, “He gave us life 2000 years ago. He’s coming back soon.”

I assumed he meant Jesus. Assuming one believes the fairy tale stories of the Bible, it was God the father who gave us life, not Christ the son. He just smoothed over our sins in his father’s eyes by dying for us, which I still don’t understand. The idea that God would sacrifice his son because mankind was so corrupt that someone had to die to pay a cosmic price… he’s fucking God, he can do what he wants. It's silly. How does sending his kid down to Earth to get killed remove sin from humanity? Anyone... ?

All that aside.

After refusing the dogmatic little pamphlet, I hopped on the train and took a seat toward the back of the car. A strange looking woman with dirty blonde hair (which she was violently pulling) started screaming about, guess who, Jesus. She reeked of booze and I think I saw a lit cigarette burning next to her.

“HE’S GOING TO COME AND JUDGE US!”

I got up and started to walk to the other side of the car. She saw me and screamed:

“AND THAT PIECE OF SHIT IS GOING TO HELL!”

Wow, is it that obvious?

Two Jesus freaks inside of five minutes. Just my luck. It’s bad enough I’ve had a lifetime of hearing about heaven and hell, but now I have to endure this shit on the train. Could this increase in Christian misinterpretation and zealotry have anything to do with the goddamn Davinci Code movie coming out? Is this a publicity stunt orchestrated by the movie studio? Fuck you, Ron Howard.

I guess living in the city has its price, and that is being shoulder to shoulder with the occasional nutjob; I guess living in the U.S.A. has its price, and they are called Christians.